Wednesday, June 16, 2004

I have just returned from the wonderful country of Norway.
The first thing that struck me when I arrived was that the sun seamed more static and further away, which it was. It's slightly colder there, more like spring weather, and it was pretty wet. It has been a good time to retreat from life in Sheffield, though I didn't find much time with God. Great to meet Miriam's friends and see another culture, though it's difficult when everyone is speaking a different language, they all understand you, but you cannot understand them! Felt quite lonely at times.
Went to a Norwegean wedding on saturday, they have some differences, the best, after exchanging rings, was having two candles representing the bride and groom, then lighting one large one and blowing out their own. Brilliant symbolism, I hope I'll do the same when I get married.
The other strange thing was how the norwegeans live on separate islands and therefore go everywhere by boat. In some ln places they've got over this by digging U shaped tunnels 250m below sea level under the fjords, ( couldn't see the signature of slaaty blaatfast though).
I bought a wonderful album by the Norwegean artist Thomas Dybdale (thats dib-dal) sings in English, and plays acoustic guitar, rather like Damion Rice.
Here's a poem I wrote on my return journey, it's not very poetic, but it says some of what's going through my mind:
Rocks, scarred out of the sea,
From high into the clouds,
Shaped into scoops of blue,
Quality reihns on the land,
Fortune pays for streets of granite,
sardines once lined pockets,
now cans are packed by another class.
Oiled from the ocean a rich nation
of beauty, delicacy, norse.
The feeling of exclusion of language
brought into inclusion by a touch,
I'm no enemy, I'm no long term friend,
Listen to my heart and I'll show you what I see
just a prayer, a connection to the one whome we're free.
This is where I loose all place
this importance of ritual familiarity
finding their roots, finding my feet.
A time of realisation
humility in helplessness, lonliness.

I was really blessed to stay with the cave's. felt like one of the family in a way I haven't experienced before...
Thank God, thankyou Norway.

Saturday, June 05, 2004

I find it really hard to rest, I don't mean sleep, I find it hard to do more passive forms of rest, it soon feels like it's fading off into meaninglessness, watching films, reading books, I can do these things when I need a break in work or other business (busy-ness), but when that's all you can do....
I came off my bike on wednesday, as some of you might know (ttai), came round a corner near church slightly too fast, on some gravel and there was a car driving on the other side of the road so I couldn't go wide. The bike came out from beneath me and I slid along the ground on my chin. I walked bleeding to church and Mary Hopkin's took me to hospital, stayed with me for about 4 hours. I had three stitches in my chin, two chipped teeth (not to the nerve), a fairly grazed face and further grazes on my hands, elbow and knees. I've got my glasses fixed (badly scratched), thank God, but the worst thing is eating as I bit into my lower lip when I fell and it's really saw. Well it could have been loads worse, I've had to explain it to everyone I see, so here's the record.
I'm getting back to normal really, it's certainly helped me not to procrastinate over sorting things out, especially as i'm going to Norway to see Miriam on tuesday. It's easy to get down at times like these, partly the shock I guess, but I don't do passivity well, and I haven't really spent time with god, I find it easier to do that on the move. I know that God is telling me to rest, so I'd better.
I've finished my Diploma (Landscape Management, 5th year), pretty sure I've passed, so what next? I've got plans, but the next few weeks I'm going to try to calm down. It's been a really hectic year in one way or another, 24 years old, life stretches before me, and I'm not going to just find purpose in doing things!!